Physician Healer

Issue 24 Rituals

Rituals

In the last week or so, I got to thinking about that good old “comfort zone” and tried to remember everything I had read about that, especially in many of the personal growth programs and classes available these days. Almost everywhere we turn, there are experts on growing personal happiness, health, wealth, and a peaceful mind set; and, they have all agreed on one thing, and that is it is not enough to know the tools but you have to use them consistently everyday. It is not enough to learn and have all that information in our heads. We have to get our hands dirty, too. This is where the real test begins.

I’ve learned that rituals are not the same as the mundane and routine things we do in the infamous comfort zone, at least in my opinion. I find rituals are very grounding and allows me to focus on what’s important in moving forward. For instance, my daily rituals may consist of a chosen set of tasks for one week and then I may choose others for the next week, and so on. On a typical morning, I will wake up and lift my right leg to cross over the left leg maintaining a supine position and hold for 10 seconds and then do the same with the other leg. I found this opens up my spine. Then, I get out of bed and avoid the urge to check the phone so that I am not filling my clear mind with peoples’ complaints or the fears and dramas of the world as depicted by the news.

As soon as my feet hit the ground, I raise both arms and yell out, “Thank you, thank you, thank you for today! Thank you for the smooth day I ended up having and I am ready for my assignment!” I find my usual spot on the floor, turn on a podcast on YouTube and begin doing my stretches, sit ups, push ups, simple yoga, lunges, leg lifts, martial art kicks, breathing exercises and maybe I’ll add on some prayers and mindful intentions. After that, I go over to the desk and journal any dreams I remember, reflect upon their meaning and then I write my list of gratitudes, everything I am grateful for that comes into my head at that moment. Sometimes I can generate a list filled with things I can see outside my window—a tree perhaps that used to be half my height, now towering over 3 times the height of the house, or maybe a bird just perched there with a song to share or the rustling of some leaves below as the lizards move past the stalking roadrunner.

After journaling and reflecting, if it is not too late, I can still help out with the pets and then make my healthy smoothie with our old Vitamix. That’s usually my breakfast unless we are meeting up with friends (in that case, we have real food). And then, there are studies that talk about the benefits of fasting and giving the stomach a rest.

On a weekday, I then get ready to head off to work and maybe later on that morning I may order a matcha green tea something or have a kombucha. Then, there is lunch and dinner after that as the day progresses and I begin the evening rituals of reading a book, listening to another podcast or lesson, journaling more things I’m grateful for that happened earlier on, thoughts and ideas for tomorrow, go to my usual spot and stretch out a bit and then I’m either seated at the desk or at my bed to meditate.

Many have asked me if I meditate to music or just allow the silence. It depends on how I’m feeling. There is no set rule and this is important to remember. Most of the time I don’t know either. I’ll turn on a guided program or meditative music and I immediately turn that off, preferring silence to any type of noise. From there, I could sit in that stillness for 1, 2, or sometimes 3 hours before I gently ease into slumber. Some have been curious and asked me if falling asleep during the sitting was a good or bad thing. It is neither. There is something called “medi-sleep” in which you start with meditation and then from there you fall asleep. For me, this produces quite the restorative sleep as the next morning I am able to wake up earlier, feeling refreshed as if I had slept 8 to 10 hours. If I am committed to doing intentional or active meditation, the goal of which is to manifest an outcome, then I do have to stay awake to be active in thought and visualization.

Recently, I talked to a friend about the challenges of keeping to rituals while traveling. It is not impossible, but it does require being ok with different settings and surroundings. Your improvisational skills come into play. And, while it can feel a bit unsettling, the egoic mind loves sameness and familiarity and so I have depended on it to allow the rituals to take place in a variety of different environments, which provides a mental level of comfort and so the egoic brain is not freaking out about change. Attachments are hard to deal with when change is at hand. I’m referring to attachments of all kinds, to people, to things, to routines, etc. They are like our favorite jeans or sweat shirts that look a little too worn to wear out but too familiar to throw away. That’s when feelings of missing loved ones, friends, certain places and events cloud our truth and our purpose of why we are all here.

I have found Eckhart Tolle’s “Power of Now”very helpful in explaining to me how to find myself in the present moment and to recognize that all emotions and feelings are created by the egoic brain, which he calls the unconscious mind. He maintains that it does not matter where we are whether we are referring to location or with whom we surround ourselves. To be present with self is to release and not possess expectations, judgments, labels, reactions and emotions. It is then, that we feel deeply that peace, that joy, that love not only with ourselves but with everyone and everything around us “right now” not tomorrow, or next week, not yesterday or last year.

Tolle goes on to say that the feeling of peace, love and joy is our natural state, for all of us, if we can get past what the ego demands of us. He reminds us that things are how they are. Things happen as they were meant to or they wouldn’t have happened. Acceptance is key to living with the 3 states of being. I read a very interesting point an author made about the common statement, “Fight for cancer.” He emphasizes that the more our mindset is to fight, the more things we don’t want persist and that perhaps we are going about the slogans the wrong way. Whatever events we judge to be unpleasant are really egoically-based. It causes us to be stuck and unable to move forward. This usually comes from our deep down feelings of not-enoughness.

I look at rituals as necessary foundational aspects of daily life. I find that they allow me to pay attention to the present moment well enough where I feel my feet are firmly rooted into the ground as I continue cultivating my physical, mental and spiritual health, in order for me to take bigger steps that turn into bigger changes on this path called life. It is like my pinching my skin to make sure I’m alive and that this is real. Yesterday evening, as I turned to a blank page in my journal to begin writing, I decided to take a few minutes to look back at the previous pages I had written. The gratitudes, though true, almost seemed embarrassingly contrived. There seemed to be a feeling of staleness as if the egoic mind played a part in that writing. As the path became a path on the move, as the travel became part of the journey itself, the egoic mind seemed lost, almost trying to wrap its head all around it but failing to do so. I could almost hear it half asleep asking, “Am I dying?” I reassured and promised it that we would always be best buds and that I would take over listing the gratitudes from here on out—well, until my best bud wakes up.

Reminders on rituals:

1) Plan out 3 things to do each morning taking 15 to 20 minutes each to accomplish

2) Remember journaling is not keeping a diary. We tend to write negative things in diaries

3) Change out the 3 things to do each morning to give variety and avoid boredom

4) Go for 24 hours without saying anything unpleasant or negative. If you say something negative or complain, you must start over. (I was only able to do this in one 24 hour period and this was 6 months ago)

5) Remember that the more you strategize, plan and expect, the more disappointed you will get. Disappointment leads to elevated cortisol (stress hormones) levels, which medical research has shown to be linked to disease

6) If you have time in the late afternoon or evening, you can carry out 3 more rituals

Thank you for reading. If you found this meaningful, please comment, subscribe and share. See you next week.

With love and gratitude,

Celeste Amaya, MD