Physician Healer

Issue 44 The Is-ness Of Things: Christmas Day

The Is-ness Of Things: Christmas Day

Last week I felt drawn into a sad abyss and wrote about the subtle heartache of memories past, nostalgia, and how they linger about us like fragrance we must let go sometime. I don’t know about you, but over the years, I have found new favorites after it was evident by the strange odor that now permeates my body with the old instead of that sweet flora aroma that once graced my olfactory collective.

Like our life’s journey, fragrance rejection is not about fickleness, some flippant whim. I believe our bodies change over time, perhaps in biochemical composition, altering the expression of certain scented notes. Our first thought, of course, could be that we could make that work again. Maybe we can apply more of that cologne or clean ourselves better with different soaps —yes, that’s it, we will make it work. We must make it work. We have to solve this problem. What if we cannot make it work? I may have to make a change. Time to worry.

Obviously, this is a metaphor, though the part of the perfume was true. What smelled lovely on me in the past now reminds me of a skunk doused in a bucket of fancy cologne. I remember thinking,

“Ewww, what on earth is happening? Is this the same one I got from before? It’s not smelling right. It’s not even smelling right in the bottle. It smells horrific.”

In life, especially most recently, significant changes have come into my home without even the courtesy of a knock. They just seemed to barge right in, uninvited. My first instinct was to remove them from the premises like intrusive guests. Not as easy as it sounds. After sitting with these unwelcome visitors, who seem to offer something different, something I’ve never experienced, I feel cautiously tempted. Until I realized that they weren’t offering a choice. This was a notification call.

I asked them for more information. Did they have pamphlets, anything? No. They brought no information. I had to just trust them. My life is comfortable and good. What could I possibly gain by trusting them? They promised great and awesome things better than what I have now. Where is the proof? I asked them. No proof. Just trust us they say. But, they say I can fight this but the result won’t be pretty. Is this a threat? No. A friendly call they say. A friendly warning.

These are the terms of the present moment. Accept the now. Don’t think. The mind is illusive. I’m still going to wait. I need to think. Then the tornado arrives. About to wipe out my home. Gotta make the move, the leap. But, I can’t just leave. This comfortable old place is falling apart. How depressing but it won’t end well if I stay. I must go to this new place that awaits me. All new places are exciting but scary at the same time. I feel uncomfortable. But, it can’t be any worse than my old home disintegrating.

Flash forward to the present time. One of the new kitchen drawers under the stove has been tweaked for months and won’t slide or close properly and despite one submitted work request after another, I kept getting the run around. Eventually, I decided to let it go. It’ll be fixed when it’ll be fixed. Stop obsessing over it. Stop getting angry, irritated and frustrated.

One Friday afternoon, as I was on my way to check the mail, I decided to make a quick stop into the main office to ask about the status of my submitted work order. And, lo and behold, wouldn’t you know — they had extra help that day and could send someone up that very moment. Sure enough, it was fixed within hours after waiting 3 months— yeah!

Then, the other day, my laptop was not allowing me to log in and the schedule was full. Normally, this would trigger great anxiety and draw out the “fixer” or “solution finder” in me. But, fortunately, I picked up on this mental chatter and decided to “be okay” with whatever this was and accept any shortcomings that presented themselves.

I reached out for assistance without any expectation. Because the IT person was accessible at that very moment, the system was corrected in minutes. One of the things about the system that plagued me for the last few months was the 2-factor identification where I had to wait for an emailed passcode before I could log into the system.

I was given heads up initially 3 months ago that there was no way to reverse this once it has been activated within the program. This glitch with the email passcode now opened a dialogue to remove the need for this feature. After just a few minutes, the 2-factor identification feature was disabled in one fell swoop. I was beyond thrilled.

It wasn’t just because I was now able to log in without having to annoyingly wait for an email but also the confirmation that once we release our anxiety, the asking of “what-ifs” and “whens” and the need to control the outcome of all events, magic really happens. What initially appeared to be an inconvenience resulted in an unexpected favorable outcome. The results were even better than anything I could have ever imagined.

“Releasing the obsession of control makes for better outcomes.”

So, this Christmas, as I reminisce with warm fondness, I look forward to celebrating new beginnings ahead, to do more accepting of whatever the present moment gives me, to actively choose to view all things that feel unpleasant as periods of personal growth, remembering that whatever is viewed as compost can be used to nurture a beautiful garden.

On this Christmas day, I choose to remember to let things play out the way they are meant to whether I like it or not. I choose to judge less and become more curious. As we end one year and move forward to a new one, I am remembering to hold space for everything that comes into my life and that everything holds a meaning and is necessary for my growth and evolution. And, as long as I remain grateful for what is in my life right now no matter what, I know with certainty now that the universe does conspire to support us and give us everything we need.

Meditation and Relaxation

Please check out this section in last week’s issue for the breathing technique and Meridian meditation.

After the concluding breathing exercises, simply leave your eyes closed and sit quietly for 20-60 minutes listening to the space and ambient noise around you to allow the mind to clear out the clutter and noise on its own.

Remember that your job is not to clear the mind nor is it to bring your mind to the present moment. It is simply to allow the opportunity for your mind to do what it needs to do which ultimately relaxes your body and permits coherence of the mind, body and spirit.

If you found this issue meaningful please click SHARE and LIKE this article. Remember to SUBSCRIBE as this is a free subscription. Please do COMMENT on one thing in particular that resonates with you or a personal experience or if you have questions about personal growth, Meridian or meditation.

Thank you for reading. Wishing everyone a very peaceful and joyful Merry Christmas🎄❄️⛄️🕊💫♥️

With Love and Gratitude,

Celeste Amaya, MD